Every year as New Year’s approaches and I reflect on the past year, I debate if I want to make any resolutions for the upcoming year. I seem to have a recurring resolution of writing more, mostly because I tend to not ever follow through on it as well as I would like. It shouldn’t be that hard to fit it into my day and yet it is.
I’ve come to realize I am a top notch excuse maker if for no other reason but that I have perfectionist habits. I put activities like writing on the back burner to make time to clean, organize and yes, waste too much time on Facebook. I did write more when I deactivated Facebook in 2013, but now I find that I rely on it too much for various articles of interest and to keep in touch with certain people that I do not know that I could deactivate it again. Limiting my time on Facebook tends to not be an option as I am very much an all-or-nothing type of person. That is why I am unsure if I could set a goal of writing X amount of time per day.
I do not want writing to become a chore; it is a passion of mine and I would not want to dread doing it. I also know though that the more often an activity is done the more likely it is to become a habit. I have always wanted to write a novel. I’ve woken up from dreams that I’ve thought would turn into great stories yet I’ve never put pen to paper and seen where I could go with them. I guess I just let everyday life get in the way too often.
Somehow certain tasks seem a lot easier when you are younger, not that I am very old at 29. I just recall being able to hammer out stories in school and 20 page papers in college without as much struggle as I find in trying to write a few paragraphs of a story now. I find the creative juices do not flow as readily. Whether that is because our dreaming diminishes as the reality of the world sets in or because everything else in life takes priority too often I am unsure. I just know that writer’s block is more frequent now, and all the wild ideas that used to flood my mind seem to have dried up. Apparently creativity is like anything else in life – if you don’t use it, you lose it.
I’m determined to get mine back though. It may never be as vast as it once was, but I know if I truly commit to writing more that it will come in time. I wrote this blog this evening, that’s a start right?